Tag Archives: privilege

Disquiet #2024

We go through the motions, I think, as we shift from one year to another. There is little to celebrate outside of the personal, and when we are self-reflexive about our privilege, the middle class guilt can only kick in. We refrain from posting food photos. We keep from the usual displays of celebration. We stay distant from the predisposition to overshare on social media.

There are a multitude of reasons, of course, to tell the world the year was good for you. And gratefulness is a good thing. For some of us though, it almost feels excessive to put it on display. This is not to question what others are doing, as it is to lean into why it is that this shift from 2023 to 2024 has demanded differently of the self. It isn’t why has it been hard to celebrate, but how it’s been difficult to put that on display. It isn’t about why there is a refusal to flex, as it is about how this denial of the reflex to share speaks to a specific kind of processing of the present.

That this sensing of the act of biting one’s tongue, almost as if (and ironically) in resistance, is happening on the first month of a new year is expected — what better time to find these words than in preparation for how we re-live the coming year?

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Let me start by saying: yes, government is responsible for this state of affairs. For the hunger. For the need and want. For the crisis that we are in, one year in this Covid-19 pandemic, with no free mass testing, no proper contact tracing, no reliable assistance for the most vulnerable, no real support for our healthcare system. One year of a Duterte government completely and utterly refusing to deliver a compassionate, competent, science-based response; one year of Duterte saying “wala na tayong pera”; one year of periodically hearing him say “wala na tayong magawa”; and this first four months of 2021 where the narrative about vaccines has been about richer countries getting our share, when in reality, it is Duterte shoving Sinovac down our throats instead. The past month of Duterte promising: things will get worse. At the same time that he says: I don’t know if we can vaccinate everyone. And also: We have done everything we can.

Yes this governance is the worst we could possibly have, especially in the midst of a public health crisis that at this point is also a socio-political-economic crisis. Yes, we want a better leader, and we work on it for 2022, but we would be glad if we could get one sooner, via a resign movement or an oust movement, both of which can only help us in building a real case against a continuation of this Duterte leadership (in the characters of a Marcos and Pacquiao).

But standing clear on the faults of this government, demanding accountability, insisting that we deserve better, does not absolve us of responsibility. It does not mean we can just do anything and be deemed faultless, it doesn’t mean we will not make mistakes.

We might be on the side of democracy, freedom, and rights, but that doesn’t mean we’re doing everything right.

This is even truer now, given the community pantries with long lines, as well as the narratives that it has created space for, the notions of the poor that it has lived off. In the course of the pantry’s virality, what has been dissolved is its core of community, what has disappeared is a basic grounding in what the poor need, who is responsible for this state of affairs, and the truth that the goal of any relief operation—and this is what the pantries are—is to make itself obsolete. What we have refused to say is that there is a virus, with variants that are not only more dangerous, but also which spread the virus quicker.

These erasures are not minor ones, and it is wrong to think that these do not matter. When what you do can be taken against you, you want to make sure that you do things better than the Duterte side. The pantries have failed at this, no matter how we silence the criticism against it.

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